November is National Adoption Month:)

Cool huh?  Guess what else...  November 19th is National Adoption Day and my birthday.  How I was not alerted to this before I became an adoptive mom is beyond me!  I should have known...  Since November is a great time to be thankful, I started listing the reasons I am thankful for adoption on Facebook.  We are now up to reason #6...  So far I have been thankful for adoption in general, Baby #1, Baby #2 and Baby #3, all three of their birth moms and for the "ripples" adoption makes and the families it changes.  Starting tomorrow, I will put a little remark on FB and explain WHY here.  I want to get into the habit of blogging a little more and being thankful for the miracle of adoption seems like as good a reason as any:)  Stay tuned...

I'm so glad they chose life...

I was alerted to a disturbing post on Facebook today.  It was a picture of a young African American woman who was pregnant.  She looked to be about 8 months pregnant, except she was pregnant with twins and the caption explained she was 25 weeks.  She was walking out of an abortion clinic where she had just had "the shot" to abort the babies.  She was now waiting to deliver these babies.  She said she did not want twin girls because she already had two girls.  She had to leave the clinic because she did not realize aborting two babies cost more than aborting one.  She had to go get more cash.

Terrible right?  I think so.

Today I burst into tears when I saw this because I cannot imagine how desperate this woman must have been to make this decision.  Who does she have in her life to tell her this is okay and encourage her to do this?  Not because of medical necessity, not because of how the babies were conceived as through an act of violence.  Just because they were girls.  She must have a lot going on in her tourtured young heart to think this was the best answer.

A few years ago, I would have had a totally different thought process than I do today.  Is this horrible, yes.  I feel sick thinking about her delivering those babies today.  I prayed for her today, all day.  I was talking with another adoptive mom about this after I saw this picture.  Adoption involves a great amount of grieving for the birth mom.  More than I will ever know.  More than I could ever imagine.  Towards the end of the grieving process, coming up on acceptance, the birth mom can reach out for hope.  She chose life.  She can hope the child is happy and heathy and loved and has been given everything she could not provide at the time the child was born.  Sometimes, she even has pictures and letters to prove it.  This woman today will go through a grieving process as well.  When she moves to acceptance, she will not have that hope to hold onto.  She made a sacrifice all right, but no hope is attached to the outcome.  None.  

All of my children's first moms had a choice.  Andrew, Annabelle and Benjamin's birth moms could have made the same choice this young woman made today.  Erased their precious lives.  Just like that.  Done.

I would never have had the chance to rock them and snuggle them and look into their eyes as they have a bottle.  I would never have seen them crawl or walk or hear the sweet sound of their little voices saying my name.  No belly laughs, no chasing each other.  No kissing and hugging and patting as they hug.  No breath on my neck as they fall asleep.  I hugged them extra close tonight and cried as we prayed for each birth mom.  Two birth moms I will never know, and one I will never see again.

Thank you sweet first moms, for choosing life.

HAPPY GOTCHA DAY!

Andrew and Annabelle on July 10, 2006...

Annabelle a few hours after we met:)

Andrew is not so sure about the sleep positioner.  I am sure the Ethiopians thought we were nuts!!

We had soccer camp this AM, and it went WAYYYY better than yesterday (read about it here).  Tonight we have VBS which is super fun, but it goes really late.  So this year our Gotcha Day festivities are limited to lunch.  I am not even sure if we will make it to Cafe LaLibela this year.  I thought, it has been six years, maybe the excitement is fading a little.  Then I posted a status about Gotcha Day on Facebook and cried like a baby.  So I guess it is still pretty fresh in my memory.
For those of you who don't know much about adoption, Gotcha Day is the day we "got" our kids.  With our first adoption we did not know about our kids on their birthdays.  So this is when we met them for the first time.  It is the bio kids equivalent to being born:)  So I guess the excitement will never fade.  Just as Mommas get sentimental recalling the day their children were born, we will continue to get sappy recalling July 10, 2006.

Brother and Sister:)

At approximately 9:30am Ethiopia time, we saw our two bundles being carried down the sidewalk at Toukoul by two sweet nannies.  I was handed Andrew, Bill was handed Annabelle.  They were Yecheneku and Hamelmal then.  All I remember is holding my son and crying.  The tears were for the sheer relief of having him in my arms after knowing him by his picture for a whole month.  Tears of joy, we were finally a family!  Tears of anxiety- WHAT WERE WE THINKING?!?!?  TWO BABIES?!?!  ETHIOPIA?!?!?  I even cried tears for their birth moms.  After the first time my eyes locked on Andrews, I was in love.  What a decision his first mom had made.  A miracle, there is no other word to describe what happened that day.  we went from a family of 2.  A sad, waiting family of two.  We were magically transformed into a family of 4.  Okay, those of you who do know adoption will attest to the fact that is wasn't actually magic.  There was A LOT of prayer and paper work and prayer and waiting and prayer and disappointment and more prayer and a really long flight and more prayer.

We should give him a pookie right?

Okay, maybe the pookie was not such a good idea!

  See the "face silky"?  We have only known her for 2 hours and she is already taking to life as a princess!  My face touching the bed?  I don't think so.  

Her other favorite position, being walked around by Momma.  For most of the trip this was the only time she was not crying:(  She wasn't at her best, she was a little sick.

Dressed in our jammies waiting to go back to the orphanage for the night.

Wait, we are going back where?!!  

Thank you Lord for giving us such an amazing reason to celebrate today!  Happy Gotcha Day Andrew and Annabelle!

Saturday was a big day!

Since we are "done" with Benjamin's adoption, I have dedicated this blog to all OTHER things adoption.  That is until God decides to add another to our family:)

That being said, I had the most amazing day Saturday.  I had the kind of day that woke me up at 4am because I was too excited to sleep.  I had an hour + drive to my destination and I cried almost the whole time.  I even thought about not wearing make-up to said destination knowing I could not keep my emotions below the surface.

You see, 6 years ago on Saturday we got the call that changed our lives.  We got referral of a 2 month old baby boy and a 2 month old baby girl.  We were finally a family after 5 years of trying:)  On that date another milestone was recorded.  My Bestie, who has 4 seriously adorable, healthy bio kiddos cried her eyes out like a baby.  So what you say??!!  She is seriously sensitive and giving, but not the kind of crier I am.  This sweet friend of mine doesn't quite weep at tissue commercials like I do...  Or at the births of ANY OF HER BIO CHILDREN!!!  It has kind of been a running joke that I cried more meeting each of  her precious babies for the first time than she did.  When we got referral, she absolutely lost it.  The story goes she actually stopped the car and cried.  When I found that out, I knew God must add to their family through adoption.  I didn't know how, and I didn't know when. So for 6 years, and the addition of 2 of her bio babies and the addition of one more adoption to our family,  I prayed.

Six years to the day after I started praying the adoption prayer for them, I had the absolute privilege of conducting their first home study visit.  God has answered my prayer, which turned out to be hers for quite a long time too.  Isn't it amazing the way God works?

Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your journey!

Delp "Crazy Party of Six" it might be time to update your blog:) 

Adoption Day

Five years ago today we celebrated what would be our very first Adoption Day:)  We went to court with two little ones all dressed up and promised to take care of them forever.  We loved them in our hearts before we even met them.  We prayed for them before we saw their pictures.  God knew the plan for how amazingly our lives would be intertwined before the creation of the world.  And yet, this formality of standing before the judge surrounded by our family was so monumental.  The words in the adoption decree state, "...From this time forward you shall bear the relationship of natural child and natural mother and natural father...".  Not biological, because no matter how much we love them, no matter how much they are just like us, they will never be biologically our own.  I think we have something better, "natural" in fact.  It is only natural that we be a family. That day 5 years ago, the court recognized our babies as "Sanborns", naturally.  We love you Andrew and Annabelle!  Happy Adoption Day!

This is us "becoming a family"

Yes, I let her have a chocolate chip cookie with whip cream for breakfast

Yes, and him too!

Dear Birthmom,

I am sure you remember today like it was yesterday.  In my heart of hearts, I feel like you knew from the minute you found out you were pregnant exactly what you would do with your child.  I think you had a few other children already struggling and the thought of another hungry mouth was almost too much to bear for 9 whole months.  I think you watched after you left to make sure she was okay, you took such care in where you placed her.  On the other hand, if I were you, I would have run as to not change my mind.  6 years ago today, we were celebrating our 5th wedding anniversary with no idea our daughter was being born.  We think it is so special to share our anniversary with her birthday, only God could have ordained that!  Your baby girl is growing into quite the young lady.  She is so smart, like wicked smart.  She loves history and the human body.  She wants to know how everything works.  She is one of the smartest kids in her class.  She has even started asking a lot of questions about you and her biological brothers and sisters.  She is touched, deep in her soul by Ethiopia and by you especially.  She is kind.  She is quite beautiful, striking to say the least.  When we go places perfect strangers compliment her on her hair, it is really long and lays in shiny curls at her shoulders.  She worries about all of us quite often,  I am afraid she gets that from me.  We are working on it, together!   She likes to know the plan for the day as soon as she gets up.  She loves to "shnugg" as she calls it, lay on the couch and hug while we chat.  This is the most treasured time of my day.  She loves to read, shop and she has started dance, ballet, at a Christian dance studio.   We pray for you each night, although Annabelle has taken over most of those duties.  I wish so badly I had a picture of you to give her I know she would love to put a face to the prayers.  She told me she knows she will see you in heaven, I don't doubt that.  We pray that as the years pass by you would continue to feel a peace and know your sweet tiny baby girl is safe and loved.  I mean really LOVED.  We pray that you would remember the short time you had with her fondly, and not with sadness as the years go by.  We pray that somehow you would understand how blessed we have been and continue to be by your sacrifice.  Thank you doesn't quite say it, but there are no words to describe how we feel about this amazing little girl.  You made it all possible.  Your decision changed the course of our lives forever, in ways we NEVER could have imagined.  Thank you for giving us Annabelle Cate Hamelmal.

Dear Birthmom,

I have no doubt in my mind you know just what today is.  I pray that as the years go by you have a simply overwhelming peace about the sweet baby you left 6 years ago.  He is so funny.  Like "come out of no where" funny.  He often surprises himself with how funny he can be.  He is strong and so tall.  He loves to run, jump and laugh.  He loves football and baseball.  He loves to get dirty and wet.  We added a new baby to our family and Andrew is his #1 pal.  They do everything together and Andrew could not be more sweet and patient.  He is smart, almost too smart for his own good!  He has had some struggles in school lately because he is learning to work the system.  Don't worry, we are on it!!!  He is a gentleman, holding doors and always helping with anything.  He is becoming more and more independent and he is very strong willed.  He is passionate and fiery about everything!  He is beyond handsome.  He is so striking, complete strangers tell me how much trouble I will be in with his "beautiful browns".  He is a protector of his sister and brother first and foremost.  We still pray for you each night.  We pray that you are healthy and safe and that your whole family has enough to eat and drink.  That last part is new as of just a few weeks ago.  He is starting to really think about the world around him.  We thank God for you and the indescribable sacrifice you made so that we, halfway around the world could become a family.  Six years ago today you made a decision that would change the course of your life and ours.  I cannot imagine what must of gone through your mind as you looked on that sweet face.  Probably the same thing that goes through mine each time I look at him, "how lucky am I?"  Thank you for giving us our precious Andrew Jess Yecheneku.