Turn of Events... Maybe...

From day one of this adoption journey almost 2 years ago we have been open to any way God would build our family.  We started our dossier preparations for Ethiopia (yeah) and are were (are) hoping to turn it in January 1.  There have also been a few situations present themselves here in the US as well.  As many of you know, we want our family to be similar racially, so an African baby makes sense.  So does a bi-racial or African-American baby.  What you may not know is that these babies are considered "special needs" in the US because they are hard to place.  The exact type of baby we would love to add to our family would have a difficult time finding a home here.  Obviously, this tugs at my heart strings just writing it.  So this has brought us to the crossroads of domestic and international adoption.  We have not made any decisions other than to look into a few agencies here in the US.  There are pros and cons of each for sure between cost, travel time, paperwork, emotion and somewhere in there we know God will make his voice clear to us. There is one thing we have been thinking about a lot.   We think we want to do the "tiny baby thing".  Andrew and Annabelle were small when they came home at 4 months for sure (13 and 8 pounds respectively).  But they made great strides soon after coming home and we caught up in no time.  I grieved for every minute of their lives I was not there to hold them and comfort them.  As all adoptive parents do.  This was only 4 months mind you!  I really have a desire for a baby in a snuggly.  You know, wrap that baby up close to my body and carry them everywhere.  Now, Annabelle was so little she was in a snuggly until she was 18 mos old and her long legs reached almost to my knees.  So be sure, I will have my baby in the snuggly regardless of how big the baby is...  HA!  Now with the new regulations in Ethiopia, it looks like the youngest baby we could bring home would be 6 to 8 months, and that is super young.  So we will be missing out on more of the baby's life.  Everyone told us, "you are so lucky to get to miss out on those first few months, not fun!", and "look how easy it was, your kids are so responsive already, little babies just lay there".  Well meaning, for sure, but these people had no idea how that grieved my heart.  We missed an entire chunk of these sweet babies lives.   Again, it's a trade off...  We would not trade ANY of it for the amazing experience God brought us through to get to Ethiopia and back.  And we know that God will reconcile any thoughts we have about either type of adoption as we go to Him with this.  If Ethiopia is God's will for us, then we will embrace it wholeheartedly and move on with turning in our dossier.  But if it isn't we want to be open to that too.  Please join us in praying for clarity and wisdom in how to proceed at this point.  We want to be sure to follow God's leading in bringing home baby #3.