Thursday, January 26, 2012

In the mail...

I know this is kind of backwards since I haven't blogged about the birthday yet (pics are coming), but today was a big day.  Today we sent Benjamin's birth mom her update.  We wrote a letter, 2 pages of how much we love him.  No holding back this time.  With each update we sent (1 a month for the first 6 months), I felt like we were reporting his height and weight and telling her thank you for choosing us.  We kind of left out the parts we thought too painful.  With this update, we told her everything.  How he is the EASIEST baby on the face of the earth.  He is a great eater and an even better sleeper.  He is beautiful, so beautiful he gets noticed everywhere we go.  I have to kiss him every time I pick him up.  It is almost a reflex.  I cry nearly everyday when I sit with him during playtime and realize how empty my arms and heart would have been without him.  We told her how Andrew and Annabelle love their sweet brother.  A smothering kind of love only siblings can give.  We told her how he was named for my precious daddy and that I often tear up when I state his whole name.  We told her he is kind of a peanut, but that is God's gift to me as I prayed for a tiny baby for years before we knew about Benjamin.  We told her every little detail, not withholding because we thought it might be too painful for her to know the intimate details of the baby she gave to us.  Also included in the box was a hard bound photo book with a zillion photos of his first year.  Finally, we sent all of his bio siblings a small teddy bear.  Benjamin has one in his room (so do the big kids), and we wanted them to have something to remember him by.
We would love your prayers for this sweet family in the next few weeks as they get the box.  Pray, as we have been, that their hearts would receive the gifts with tenderness, not with hurt and sadness.  Pray that this year finds them in a better place than last year did.  Pray that Benjamin's birth mom would be more and more convinced with each sentence she reads and each picture she sees, that she made the right choice.  Pray that God would give all 6 members of that family a peace about the decision that was made.  Pray that they would come to see (if they haven't already) adoption as the miracle it is, orchestrated by God's hand. 

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

One year ago today...

No, I haven't lost it and forgotten when my 3rd child's birthday is... I have been weepy all week in anticipation of Benjamin's big day:)  I have also been thinking a lot about one year ago today.  One year ago today, we were just packing and unpacking a gender neutral suitcase in anticipation of our baby boy who was to be born on Februaty 4.  My Aunt Brenda and my mom had helped finish the nursery just the day before.  My good friend Emma's parents, Mr. and Mrs. Ellis called and offered to pay for our airfare to and from Utah.  What a blessing!!!!!  We politely declined and said we shouldn't need help with airfair unless birthmom went into labor the next day (funny joke huh?).  We still had no name for him, and were were growing quite fond of "sweet pea", as we were referring to him as we decided on his name.  Little did we know that we were experiencing some lasts.  We had dinner together for the last time as a family of 4.  We did bath time for 2 babies for the last time.  I tucked in my kids for the last time as a momma of 2.  I said good night to my "Baby Boy" without having to differentiate which one I was talking to. I had one son and one daughter that night.  As I laid down to sleep my mind was racing with the thoughts of that sweet baby and all the preparations needed.  Would he have dark brown eyes, or light brown?  Did I restock the diapers in the changing table?  Did I pack enough wipes for the trip?  Would he have a ton of hair or none at all?  Did I include the bedazzled hat and bow just in case the doctors were wrong about the sex of the baby? Would his birth mom change her mind?  Would she like us?   How many pairs of gloves would we need?  I remember thinking, "slow down Molly!  You have until February 4, none of this is going to need to happen tonight!"  I also remember praying, "Thank you Lord for giving me just enough time to wait.  Not too much, not too little."  Of course we never could have dreamed that night would be the last night without our sweet Benjamin in our arms.

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Okay, so we missed a few milestones....

Hello, my name is Molly and I am a TERRIBLE BLOGGER!!!  So let's rewind a little so we can share some "big deals" happening around our house!

November 10, 2011
THis was soooooooooo deserving of it's own post on the actual day, but I was exsausted from all the crying (you know me).  The crying actually started the second we started speaking with our court appointed attorney.  Just to fill in a few details, It took us a long time (seemingly) to finalize because of the  laws in Utah and Arizona.  Utah requires a 6 month wait after the baby is placed in the home.  This isn't for birth mom to change her mind, or for other family to come out of the woodwork, it is just to make sure the family is working well and everyone is adjusting.  Well, we did and when Benjamin was 6 months old, we got clearance from our agency in Utah to finalize (that was in July).  Then we applied for finalization with the state of Arizona in August and were granted our court date of November 10th.  So that takes us to the court house with our little family of 5, Mimi, Grandpa, Aunt Frankie, Aunt Brenda, Aunt Shari and Gigi.  We were joined outside by our friends Miss Erin and Baby Will.  We were late (of course) and when we finally made it through the metal detectors and into the waiting room, I was already crying with the weight of the day.  Benjamin was still "Baby Boy P*******", legally anyway.  We were making him a Sanborn!!!!  When we met for a few minutes with our court appointed attorney, she read over the docs with us (we had already done this, so it shouldn't have been so emotional, but it was) and I was crying again.  Inside the court room, I of course got really nervous and started crying all over again as we got sworn it.  The wording of the court documents really hit me, "..from this day forth you shall bear the relationship of parent and child..."  WOW!  We have been caring for this sweet peanut everyday of his life, but to swear on a bible with your right hand and promise to do what is right...  It really reminded me how very important being a mommy is.  It also reminded me how good God is to bring 3 babies into our home.  Three precious ones whose stories are being written right in front of our eyes, stories God has known from the beginning of time.  Stories we are beyond blessed to be a part of.
This is us with our attorney

And drumroll please....  Our first official photo of Sanborn Party of Five